q: what do garbage men eat?
a: garbage!

credit cards

the boys are playing something rough involving pillows in the other room while we clean up from dinner.
ralph: i have a credit caaaaaaard!
lionel: i have ten thousand credit cards... and they're all cut up!

ralph (to jenny): if i could just have three pets i would want them to be a moth, a worm, and a cricket.
brian wolfe (overhearing): ralph, we can make that happen for you!

lionel: oh sweet mother of mercy!  that's what you say, sweet mother of mercy.
ralph: what about midnight? it has storms.
lionel: not storms, snores!
ralph: i saw it on qubo.
both: moooooooooom!
lionel: ralph, let me tell you something, sometimes rupert is not true.
ralph: i'm not listening!

tuesdays with ralphie

while making oatmeal cookies, lionel was naked.  ralph 'slapped' him on his sweet buns:
lionel: mom!  ralph slapped me on my B-U-T-T
mom: ralph, time out.  take some time to think about what you have done.
(5 minutes)
mom: ralph, do you know why you were in time out?
ralph: (whispers) yes.
mom: tell me about it.
ralph: i slapped lionel on his T-O-A-R.  (he can't spell)

ralph: mom!  mr. tuohey was lying that we eat thomasita (the hamster in his classroom.)  because she is cute and i don't want to eat her!

ralph: (singing a song by the dameans) spefor, are you listening?
actual words: speak, Lord!  i'm listening.

levels

lionel is on the couch playing on the ipod telling us all about his levels when he is interrupted by ralph.
ralph: i am SO going to ground him! (his balloon from "short clips" named strucula)
dad: what does it mean to ground somebody?  is it when you keep them on the ground?
ralph: no, it's when you get mad at them and then you get happy at someone else and, and....
lionel: no it's not, ralph!  it's when you get sent to your bed for a day or a week or...
cecelia: (from the other room, doing a book report) ...or a month.

lionel is singing loudly and baritone-y.
dad: lionel, why are you singing oferetto?
ralph: it's ofra, dad.
lionel: who is alfred?
cecelia: it's opera!
ralph: no, it's not!  it's OFRA!!

dreams

ralph: uh, dad!  i'm going to dream about things that i like tonight. like nice insects, dressing up, fun stuff!
dad: fun stuff like what?
ralph: uh, i forgot.

lionel: hey guys!  cecelia's allergic to soup!   (he means addicted!)

tonight jonathan and i looked at professional pics taken from the weekend celebration of the first 100 years of rockhurst.  his favorite picture is of four people we encounter pretty regularly who have no idea who we are!  (tee hee)

centennial celebrations

today we went to the rockroom for breakfast.  there were free video games, pool tables, shuffleboard, and foosball.  the kids were in 80's hog heaven.  breakfast was continental, ralph thought that a cheese bagel was a donut.  it took one bite for him to realize it wasn't.  he tried to sneak the bagel with one bite missing into the harvester's bin, on his tippy toes, looking around suspiciously, hand teetering above the opening to the bin.  fortunately, for harvester's, dad lead him in the right direction just in time.  then we loaded up on a bus and headed to harvester's.  we organized the breads into boxes and ALL the kids helped.  it was awesome and they can't wait to go back for each of their birthday parties!!!  on the bus the boys were pointing out bodies of water, cars, trucks, piles of dirt, ducks...

lionel: look at all those ducks!
ralph: what if all the ducks came onto the bus with us?
lionel: that would not be good at all.  they would just peck us!

pizza and poker

tonight, for the first night in many many nights, we were just a family.  so we celebrated with pizza outside and poker.  mom taught dad and cecelia and lionel how to play 5 or 7 card draw or stud.  tonight we introduced the ideas of chips, antes, and poker faces.  cecelia put us all to shame with her EXCELLENT use of a poker face!

lionel threw a chip in for mom, who was running LOW.
cecelia: why did lionel give you a chip?
mom: because he loves me!
cecelia: oh! in that case... (throws a chip at lionel)
lionel: BIG toothless smile!

ralph showed off his friday folder.  he REALLY loves school now!  he also has a black eye.  he fought with the playground equipment and lost :(  BUT... he did get to bring home the 'mystery can' tonight.

lionel got to bring home curious george and the various stories to be read this weekend.  hope we can find time between all our centennial celebrations at rockhurst: breakfast, service project, mass, dinner/dancing, brunch...

mom played itunes throughout.  the song 'say' by john mayer came on.  ralph decided to sing along, "samwich you need to say..."

God's creation

last night, my little God's creations and i were sitting on the porch enjoying dessert.  the crickets were singing, the breeze was blowing, the air was cooling down.  Lionel pipes up about how he loves this time of night.  "I can hear God's creations, the crickets, chirping.  Are those crickets?" "yes." "oh. 'cause i thought maybe it was a nocturnal animal."

the boys proceeded to turn their bed into a 'birnnest,' and sleep in it!  the next morning, they came bounding into our room, acting like birds, flying from their birnnest into our bed!  what will mornings be like when they decide they are too old to snuggle with us? :(

certificates

tonight we went to the royals game.  a first for all the kids.  a celebration of "half-way to st. paddy's day."  we went to guest services to get certificates for each of the kids to commemorate the experience(jeff howe's idea.)  the lady behind the desk was asking them what their names are and how to spell them.  "cecelia, C-E-C-E-L-I-A. klem, K-L-E-M."  "lionel klem, L-I-O-N-E-L, K-L-E-M.  and my middle name is jude."  "ralph, you spell that R-A-L-P-H.  and that comes with a rulus."

the park

today after mass, ralph and i went to a park across the street. ten or so years ago it was a nice park, new recycled tires for bedding and new structures made out of recycled products... really cool! today, not so much. there were bullet holes, graffiti tags, and debris everywhere. granted it IS, technically, in the hood, but i was still disappointed. i'll tell you who was NOT disappointed... ralph! he had a ball! there were still structures intact and fun things to do, we were there about an hour. the first thing we did was swing on a tire swing. i got it going around and around and whizzing. ralph was giggling and laughing and said, "mom! this makes a tickle in my penis... it's really weird!" when i told jonathan, he told me he remembers saying that as a kid.

cecelia was SOOO helpful the other night to jonathan, that he decided to buy her a new binder for school, something she has wanted for a while. they went to officemax and found one for $8. but the one cecelia wanted was $16 dollars. she was fine with the $8 one. but jonathan demonstrated to her how proud we are of her and how much it means to us when she is helpful and he splurged for the $16 binder. she was SO EXCITED!!!!!!!!! she thanked and thanked and thanked him! then at bedtime, she said, "if i had a little sister, i could give this binder to her when i am finished with it, but i have brothers!!"

house of cards

"angel of god my guardian dear, to whom God's love convinces me here..." (lionel)

" i pledge allegiance to the flag, da da da da... and one nation and liverty and justice for all!" (ralph)

"mom! ralph can rap dance!" (cecelia, as ralph spins on the kitchen floor on his butt)

after dinner we made houses and teepees out of cards. and ralph 'bowled' them for us.

life is hard when you have a broken neck!

so yesterday i come home from my run and ralph was laying on the couch ensconced in the blanket we throw over the corner. he said, with a frown, "hi mom. i broke my neck." he looked SO pathetic! "i feel killed!" he said. then he limped around the soccer field, when he wasn't pitching a fit about his leg, his neck, or his shoulder. poor baby! he spent all of saturday and sunday with his head at a 50 degree angle to the right.

"moooooom! do i have a folder in my packpack? yes! i do!! whaaaaaat's in it? why, look! it's a picture of the americas of unite a states!" as he stands there holding an outline of 'AUS' with scribbles in and out of it representing oceans, and mountains, and grass, oh! and volcanos!

here it is two days after i started this and now i'm having a hard time remembering everything that has been said.

last night we watched staci and graham's girls so they could go to the chief's game. those girls just absolutely WORSHIP cecelia. and cecelia really stepped up to the plate and became 16 all of a sudden. she was such an impressive babysitter! rallying the ladies, helping put on pajamas, reading them a bedtime story. and her face...! you should have seen the pride in her face. i wish we could provide a baby sister just to see that face again.

the rules

today was ralph's first day NOT at border star. i think he was a bit sad being the only one NOT going to school today... but not for long. i took him on a 'venture.' we went to powell gardens and caught butterflies and grasshoppers with our bare hands. ralph learned that you catch more butterflies when you approach them slowly and gently, not by batting your hands at them and clapping. he was pretty excited. he also loved all the giant wooden 'bugs.'

the weather cooperated. we went to the store for banana milk and came out with peaches, apples, oranges, makings for chili, ro-tel dip, greek yogurt, and a bunch of other necessary/unnecessary items. you decide.

after school we went to the playground, home with the tuoheys, then off to our respective sports. cecelia and lionel had soccer, and i ran. 6 in 54 min! i forgot we were going to dinner to celebrate my mother and her birthday, and i accidentally made dinner. it smelled delicious, hopefully it will again, tomorrow! greek chicken with cumin, cinnamon, garlic, and ginger; rice with a home made tomato sauce with cumin, garlic, onions, and cracked pepper.

after dinner we came home and ate my mother's birthday pistachio cake. yum! and the bedtime routine played out exactly perfectly. as we lay on the boys' bed and prayed, i asked that we pray for denise (my PT who is in jail on manslaughter charges.) lionel asked if she was STILL in jail and when she would get out. i suggested maybe we could visit her (she always loved the kids!) he got scared and said jail might be spooky. ralph agreed. so i said we could just write her notes. lionel asked if we could, please, just mail them. ralph said, "no! we'll drop them off!" and lionel immediately worried about the guards. ralph said we could ask them to let her go. i gently suggested we just make her pictures and notes and, if ralph wants, we could drop them off on thursday. ralph said, "sure! we can write them notes saying to let her go out of jail." i said it's not that easy. he explained to me that we should go by his rules and just get her out because his rules are better... just more fun! ... he's right about that!

i snuggled with cecelia as she drifted off to sleep. as i turned to go, she told me i could leave. i asked her if she really wanted me to stay, she said, "no. because i'm a tired awesome girl and i have homework to do early in the morning." ...and SHE'S right!

good night!

labor day 2010

happy birthday, peter!

as i sit here listening to the sounds of my kids, i hear... coughing. cecelia's allergies are out of control and this weather is nuts!

lionel is in the boys' room (with a new set-up: the boys' beds are pushed together and that make for two VERY happy boys!) reading the yearbook to ralph. he is prepping ralph for life at st. elizabeth's, which starts wednesday. ralph is excited and actually HAPPY to go to school. he can't wait to be reunited with all his old buddies from pre-preschool. luke, will, and myles. miss erin is like a dream come true compared to the mess that is the evil miss langston (principal.) we did, however, have a tearful goodbye with ms. fletcher. possibly the best teacher in the kc metro area! we are sad to leave her :(

we have had a very kansas city weekend. we went to irishfest last night and a block party (black pride!) at the power and light district today via the max with nicole. now, in this awesome weather, we are chilling out with our NEW windows OPEN!!

we went to mass at st. e's; to american girl (just cecelia and me) to barbeque at the wolfe's house, to hang out poolside with susan and her friends from new york, jim and john; to dinner at the weidler's to celebrate peter's birthday: porkfest! pork chops marinated in a few different types of marinade, pickle juice won hands down! i felt like we were living the american dream this whole weekend. it was chock full of bbq's, late nights at the neighbor's house, festivals, bus rides... so fun!

right now, they are looking through the yearbook for 'john bush.' cecelia's name for the presidential candidates (all rolled into one) from 2004, john kerry and george bush. dad just informed them he is 'right there.' lionel said, "really?" and ralph answered, "yeah! he's up in the sky."

cecelia is showing us ralph's 'feature.' he is pictured in a montage in cecelia's first grade yearbook. "yeah. here he is... and he is playing with a marker!"

ralph:" on the rescuers, this bird was like... mayday! mayday!"

lionel: "i know."

ralph: "um... i'm talking to my pengie." "bertend a pillow fell on your pruple bear."

ahh the sounds of playing boys, and a quiet, hormonal girl.

good night and god bless.

i have a friend who loves me, who loves me, who loves me...

i have a friend who loves me and jenny is her name! hi jenny! today was a trying day... certainly not the worst, just difficult, and i was feeling AGGRESSIVE to top it all off. yet, right now as i sit here on my deck with a beautiful evening breeze blowing, i feel like everything is going to be okay. it always is.

today was ralph's first day of school at border star. ralph, although the most easygoing of our children, is being used as a weapon/pawn against us by his principal. stupid lady! she'll get hers! so we are looking into st. elizabeth's after all. i really hope i can work it out to have ralph at st. e's this year and, subsequently, have one more year with him home with me once or twice a week. i have missed those days and longed for those days.

i made up with my mother-in-law. hi sue! it was a hard phone call to make simply because i had no idea what i was up against. but there ended up being nothing but love. thanks for that!

my husband came home after toiling away, worried and upset. about ralph, about his mom, about the financial state we're in (we've been in worse!) and about our ever changing, seemingly more and more full schedule.

the kids, thankfully, are unaffected. they came home talking about homework, making up pat-a-cake games, and 'tickets' to eachother's rooms. a ticket consists of 1/3 of an 8x10 piece of paper with a giant letter on it (c=cecelia, l=lionel, r=ralph.) now cecelia is hopping in the tub with ralph to teach him more pat-a-cake games. lionel is calling, so gotta go...

i could really use a wish right now, a wish right now...

so tonight ralph is headed back out to the car to look for some lost wings for his guy. on his way out: "dad! i have three, no four, just four wishes! 1. that my pets could come alive, 2. that my blue blankie was a magic carpet, 3. that i could go outside without shoes on, and 4. that i could find the wings for my guy!"

you know at the beginning of the monkey bars? well i fell from there today and now my knee is stiff and it hurts. it's not so careful being a 6 year old as it is being a 4 year old or an 8 year old, you know!

cecelia: lionel? lionellllllllllllll!??!

lionel: i'm not lionel. i'm noah.

my great great granson, lionel, is NOT available!

cecelia worked on her child of god project for GS. this is a picture of what she made! i love her! i love her creativity! i hope it grows!

today, at school, lainey did not sit with her at lunch. lainey wanted to sit with the cool girls, so she left cecelia in the dust. cecelia did not care. she told me, very matter of factly, why lainey was sitting elsewhere. i was TORN UP inside!! i was so mad! i listened to the conversation of those girls... shameful!! rude!! selfish!! downright MEAN!! and they are only in third grade! i'm proud of my girl for being so UNaffected. she really is an awesome little lady!

my baby is gone!

yesterday morning my baby baby ralph left with gramma and papa to go to wisconsin for a week. somehow, this one was harder. i REALLY don't want him to grow up, even though he's been telling me since he could talk, "mama, i grow up."

he left without abandon. he did not care! he hopped right up in that car like it was nothing for him to leave his mother! i guess i have some preparation to do before college.

meanwhile, back at the homestead, we have been living it up with only 2 kids... both of whom can pretty much take care of themselves. fewer fights, smaller messes, faster departures... less love for mama :..(

last night, we visited the library, the mixx, and a meeting at st. peter's. today, we went to breakfast, to mass, to susan's pool, and to the ice cream social. right now i am waiting for two naked little messes to clean themselves up in the tub and shower in preparation for school tomorrow... oh yeah! fewer lunches to pack!

i love you, ralph! i miss my baby baby!

we went to the zoo zoo zoo

ralph was sick this weekend, so i took monday off work (kind-of... i went in from 6AM until 730AM) and took the kids to the zoo. we fed lorikeets, twice. we rode the carousel, twice. we watched the sea lion show, only once. we climbed trees, fed deer, danced in spray areas, visited the brand new exhibit with polar bears, played with crazy monkeys, learned about momma's favorite monkeys (see no evil, hear no evil, speak no evil... have no fun) and slid down slides. all the world was right that day.

AFS called the other day to see if we would be interested in hosting a foreign exchange student. I told them i would talk it over with my husband and get back to them. she emailed me the information for the 16 and 17-year-old students and jonathan and i looked it over. we decided, after much discussion in front of the boys, that our house will be suitable for a such a visitor in 8 or 10 years. that way, our kids can better interact with the student and offer a more entertaining sojourn to america. in our discussion, we mentioned our own experiences with foreign exchange situations, as a student as well as in the position of host. when i was a senior in high school, we had a girl from the netherlands stay with us for a while, a few weeks. lionel informed me that it's not the otherlands, it's actually SUtherlands. ralph stayed in his own world, as host and student, speaking with british and australian accents.

ralph and lionel's latest obsessions are with the "shakolater." ralph will come up and give my arm some love, then grab it and tell me that, yep, i DO need the shakolater. a shaking weight that is supposed to 'shake' the weight off whatever on your body is not firm.

lionel loves the commercial on qubo for qubo stating that nothing inappropriate is ever shown.

ralph pipes up with another product we might consider where a man 'magics' ingredients into the thing and it magics into a smoothie. (the magic bullet.)

cecelia has her own favorite... telling dad that he needs a tempurpedic bed because it melts the stress of your day away. she says it just like that.

well, it's 10PM, time to hang out with jonathan and melt the stress of our day away...

joy to the world!

"...that barney's dead. they bar-b-qued his head! don't worry about the body, just flush it down the potty. it circles around in o's, like a bowl of cheerios..." sung at the top of ralph's lungs.